Reframing Success

If you have been kind enough to follow some of my posts, you might already know that I love a good step back to look at what is in front of me and re-evaluate if I am looking at the wood or the trees…

Sometimes, this reflection / step back is necessary because certain targets and goals have been reached, and there is a need to gain prospective in order to set new goals.

Sometimes, situations are forced upon us where we need to regroup in order to get the most out of it!

This time - it’s the latter!

As a result of some fantastically fun racing, and a bit too much enthusiasm and not enough self care, i’m injured.

I promised you I would be transparent with my behind the scenes vibes, so …. I’m also devastated! to the point where it has been a full week, and I am only just now finding a more positive way of looking at the situation and processing it….

…And this right here is what I would like to talk about.

Less because this is a space where I talk about health and fitness, or rowing, but because as a freelancer processing new information and adjusting to a new dynamic that is not of your making is a very valuable skill to have, or at least be mindful of. It is fundamental in the ‘behind the scenes’ life of the every day hustle.

The last two weeks have taken me though a whole range of emotions, some I hold less space for, but they are there and have to be processed none the less! I have journeys through resentment, disappointment, failure, denial, acceptance, demotivation, exhaustion to name a few.

So how do we turn a pretty dismal situation, that is out of our hands, into something that can working our favour?

I’m no psychologist, or therapist, but I do have a lot of life experience, so i’ll talk you through how I am turning my frown upside-down.

Don’t Panic, It’s only information coming in!

Aknowledge that there is a shift and that the shift may or may not have an impact on you and your current path and goals. Allowing some space for all of the ‘data’ the failure and the sadness, the disappointment and anger, see it walk into the room and acknowledge it. It’s taking a little time to listen to your body and your mind and how the new information is shifting things around. That’s ok right?

So in walks time…. time to process it! …. all of the emotions, all of the feelings all of the doctors recommendations and physio notes, it’s all information coming in. So being kind and taking some time to process it is how to better learn and understand how this situation has impacted the status quo and what elements need to be looked at in more detail.

Make a Choice!

Making a considered choice about which thoughts are allowed to live rent free in your mind and daily practice, needs to be something that we as humans get better at managing. For example - failure gets little time to live rent free in my mind, but disappointment, that might need a little more unpicking as to why it is there in the first place.

I’m a firm believer that the more you look at the light, the more light you will see. So when things get a little dark and overwhelming, remind yourself of that choice, of actively looking for the light and the joy in each moment and it will help shed a bit of perspective on the issue.

What ever your choice - You have to back yourself on this one - it’s your choice, so be in your own corner.

Add in a dash of Perspective

More often than not it can feel like the world is imploding, and I hear you! it really does! ok - so if it is - is focusing on it imploding going to get you out of the current ‘tight spot’ ? We might loose a client here and there, we might not get a job or a contract, but it might be ok, it might be a good thing, we just can’t see it yet. Look at the other fantastic clients we have and send them some love and gratitude, it will help make loosing one, less intense.

Adding in perspective helps keep the engagement levels up as well. It’s easy to drift away form the thins we love when being there causes us pain and is a reminder of what we have lost. To push ourselves away rather than being rejected or feeling not good enough. Stay engaged with the elements that always bring you joy, focus on them and bask in their light.

There is a significant differnece between blind positivity and staying positive whilst processing the range of emotions, make sure you spend time in the light and remind yourself that it is there as well.

All is not lost.

And most importantly… Ask the hard questions - as often as you can.

Will giving this emotion free reign in my mind make my daily life better or will it put me on a downward spiral?

Will this choice lead me to where I want to be?

Am I being fair and kind to myself?

With the new situation in front of me, what does success look like to me now?

What does success look like to you in this new situation?

…. this is one of my favourite questions as once I have processed all the emotions and worked out my new ‘truth’ as a result, I need to turn it around and reframe what success looks like to me now the land has changed, to make sure it am looking forward and feeling good.

What does success look like to you, now the board game has changed, how can you turn it into a situation that can be positive for you.

So what’s your answer?

I’m still working on mine! but I know happiness and growth are going to be in there somewhere.